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Evidence of war crimes

Expectations are high today with the anticipated announcement of the outcomes from the Komodo Commission into Regatta War Crimes. After a week of evidence, including graphic photos and witness statements, it seems certain that the Commission’s findings will be damning, and the recommendations far-reaching.

“It’s like there were tigers on the boat” said Rob, one of the injured paddlers from the weekend’s racing. “With such a long time between regattas there was clearly an enormous amount of built up tension, and it was taken out physically”.

“I stung a bit at the time,” said Millsy, “but I knew it was bad when the beetroot started to leak out onto my shirt”. Both Rob and Millsy were hospitalised in the Komodo after-regatta beer tent for treatment, but are expected to make a full recovery. Neither would identify their offenders, claiming “what happens on the boat, stays on the boat”.

Paddlers demonstrating their innocence

An investigation was launched, with paddlers asked to show their hands to see if any beetroot was present. It’s unknown at this time if the Commission has identified the culprits, however Commissioner Coops did present a short media conference outlining some of the actions that will be recommended in the findings.

“It’s clear that spending so long in training without regattas creates a pressure cooker environment” Commissioner Coops reported. “As a sport we need to recognise that Komodo’s need to race, and if they are left without racing for extended periods they can go hostile. The full report from the Komodo Commission will be released shortly, but you can expect to see recommendations around the removal of sharp objects from the boat, advanced training in evasive hinging techniques, and much shorter stints between races.”

Smiling faces completely unaware of the dangers ahead

With the next regatta only a week away it’s a timely reminder that the sport of Dragon Boat racing can be fun, but only if performed in a safe manner.

Story by Coops